In the last few months these blogs (that I have seen; I am sure there are many more) have been touched by anonymous commenters of vitriol. Diary of a Yummy Mummy, who was told she looked old in a post that featured a photo of herself. Kasey at Lola B's, who provoked a disproportionately strong reaction with her April Fools post that someone didn't quite 'get'. Mrs A in the Cove whose pain-staking and beautiful house renovation was poo-pooed by an anonymous commenter. And then Little Emma English Home who was told by an anonymous commenter that she had plagiarised another blogger's pictures. Bizarre. I love especially that Ziara from Little Emma English Home had to slip into her Italian mother tongue to publish a responsive rant to the comment! Sometimes only that will do. When delivering a riposte what better language than Italian to do it in? Although I don't know Ziara well at all, I imagine her typing away and pausing every now and then for a hand gesture and flailing of arms ;-)
So what is it? I do acknowledge that blog commenting is a strange sport and can feel a bit like making friends in the school playground. You know where little girls say 'I like that and this and I like your shoes and I like your hair and I like your Barbie and I like your rucksack and I like your smile' etc etc. We all like a lot of the same stuff; that's a given. Plus sometimes there are parallel posts where pictures are used and you get that distinct sensation that you've seen it somewhere before. That's just a spooky coincidence.
For what it's worth, I have a live and let live philosophy in life. People make their choices, they do their thing. I agree in some cases, in others I don't. If I don't agree I generally keep that opinion to myself as I would rather be respectful and polite than confrontational and mean-spirited. That's just me. As I always say it's whatever floats your boat...just be kind.
P.S. Hello to Amelia...my 100th follower :-)
Well said girl!! I don't mind at all for this post, indeed it's a good reaction. And you made me smile, I really did those things!!! It's very Italian uh?
ReplyDeleteI think that those people are not bad they just don't know when shut up....But it's really a waste of time to think about them more than 2 secs... Have a lovely day, xoxo
I find it strange the whole mean commenting thing. If you don't like someone's blog...don't read it.
ReplyDeleteI read blogs I love and relate to and also ones that have a different way of looking at things from myself....I guess I see it as a celebration of everyone's uniqueness.
xoxo DJ
yehar- i am with you all the way....if you can't say something *nice* to someone you've never met...& you can't even put your name to the negative comment you choose to write...be it anger/fear/yu don't give a toss/or just bored... then DON'T COMMENT!!
ReplyDeletethanks Lou for clearing that up for all THOSE people out there.....
m x
Dear Lou
ReplyDeleteI "saw" you at Zaira's Blog and felt the need to come and visit you! This post is just perfect my darling, well, well done! I don't allow anonymous comments anymore and maybe that's why I'm starting to get nasty emails;-) I had to take my email adress off my side bar..this is just crazy.. I mean, blogland is a democracy but rudeness is just well.. rude!
BTW,can I tell you I just love your blog?? It's really fresh and genuine and I adore your pics!
Keep up the good work and enjoy your day!
P.S. I'm your newest follower :-)
xx Flaviana
I got an absolute shocker last week. It had a name, but no tie back to a blog. I chose to publish it 'cos at the end of the day the Commenter's stupidity reigned supreme & spoke volumes. I guess that we put ourselves out in the public arena via our blogs, so these things are bound to happen. Wonderfully though, Leanne A. had the most +ve reaction & has gained a much wider audience due to the dignified way in which she handled her fruitcake Commenter!
ReplyDeleteMillie ^_^
Well said. I haven't had any nasty / rude comments... yet. But if someone hasn't got the courage to add their name/link then they should keep their bitchy little remarks to themselves. Found you via Simone. Great blog. Only nice comments coming from me for sure.
ReplyDeleteI absolutely agree! I can't figure out whether these people are cowards or a*holes ... Would they say that sort of garbage to someone in real life or are they just hiding behind the anonymity of the internet? Grr.
ReplyDeleteI am lucky, the worst I've had is somebody telling me a pair of shoes I own are ugly!!
ReplyDeletex
Hear hear! I definitely don't get it either. I haven't had to deal with any nasties, but I only have a handful of readers. It is a bit too easy to cower behind anonymity, and I just assume these people are jealous or have something else going on in their lives that would cause them to want to be hurtful. But still. It's easy to tell that you are a "live and let live" person, and I think that's why the number of your followers keeps going up!
ReplyDeleteI deplore nasty commenters, and I think they are always anonymous! Do people ever leave a nasty one with their name on it?
ReplyDeletePeople should have the courage to have an open discussion and honest opinion on the blogs without to keep them honest and authentic and not all fluff.
Great post Lou for getting discussion going. thanks
I haven't experienced this yet but I'm thinking that it's only a matter of time. A dear friend of mine describes your live and let live philosophy (and really should there be any other) as 'taking the floral high ground' where there is no being smug or moralistic, but just going to a place where everything smells nicer! I like it, and have stolen it unashamedly for my own use!
ReplyDeleteAmen to that Lou - I would love to know if my nasty commenter came back to visit and got to see the reaction to their comment! Unfortunately there is always one but it so nice to know that there is so many many more kind and thoughtful people out there. Leanne xx
ReplyDeleteHey Lou!
ReplyDeleteI've been reading your blog for about four months and it is just beautiful. You have lovely taste. I've been blogging for seven months and so far only two negative comments. One guy said to me 'moving on'. Why he wrote that, I have no idea. The other guy wrote 'whoever writes their about page in the third person is a dork.' I got a good laugh out of that one.
Here's an article on how these guys plan their days. I hope you don't find the language towards the end offensive. It's more about understanding what motivates people to write a comment.
Take care.
http://www.theonion.com/articles/local-idiot-to-post-comment-on-internet,2500/
Julie
My blog is http://julieangelos.com ~ you are welcome to visit. :)
Well said LouBoo, but you've got me worried! I haven't had to deal with this yet, so when it happens, I'll come back to this post of yours for comfort.
ReplyDeletePersonally I just don't see the point - surely one of the great things about blogland is the pleasantness and kindness between bloggers. What is the point of leaving an nasty comment !!??
Thanks for this one.
Sharon
I've heard a few horror stories of bloggers getting very nasty comments from anonymous commenters and wondered the same as well. Why? It's great that you've spoken out about it. Here's to positive comments or, at least, taking credit for your negativity.
ReplyDeleteWell said Louise....you know my feelings on this after I expressed it over what happened with Leanne - and I know you were one of the first to visit her and say something kind and supportive - as you always do.
ReplyDeleteI just don't get the anonymous comments at all....why bother? If I don't like something, I either don't read it or I don't comment. Life is too short to be so mean.
It hasn't happened to me yet, but I am sure it will do....yikes!
Yippee for 100+ followers.....that is wonderful! I want the world to visit and read you....you are SO worth it xoxo
Always fascinates me how some people seem to go out of their way to spread negativity - if you don't have something nice to say, just skip commenting and move on...
ReplyDeleteI guess you just have to let it roll off your back and figure they must be rather miserable to be trying to drag people down with them...
But let's focus on the positive shall we? Congrats on 100 follows and a really beautiful blog! You have a great eye for detail.
Hope you're having a lovely week!
xo
You know, what’s that saying Louise, if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all? The fact that people have the guts and time to go out of their way to say something mean, really baffles me. Especially when it comes to personal things like your physical attributes or home. I am all for free speech but a blog is so personal; know your boundaries! Love the above image. What a gorgeous lady. Much like you : )
ReplyDeleteAND yay! 100 followers. Cyber hug for you!
Well said Louise.
ReplyDeleteAnd don't worry, I am not trashing my dress. My husband pointed out to me that I would be excited then start crying, and he is right!
:) Marcie
Louise thanks so much for your earlier comment on my blog re: the shoes. It was so very kind and much appreciated.
ReplyDeleteI have to say I absolutely love this post you've done. Well said, indeed. It is a scary thing to put yourself out there and hope to find commonality with others. This past month has found me in the gracious company of fellow bloggers who have been welcoming and generous, but I have seen other blogs where commenters are down right mean. And I just don't understand why someone would take the time and energy to insult someone else. It seems counterproductive and simply mean-spirited.
I'm with you on the live and let live motto. Sharing ideas and pondering the thoughts of others is the way we grow as human beings.
I also go by "know your role and shut your hole". It's not my job to blurt out insensitive things to another person who is simply expressing their opinion on something. Like my mother always said - If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
Bravo and thank you!!
these people are cowards. how bizarre. be nice. always
ReplyDeleteGreat post! One of my other blog friends is apparently being harassed by mean comments, it's crazy! It is just really petty and mean, and probably results out of jealousy. Oh, and um, reposting photos is WHAT BLOGGERS DO! That's the whole point! It actually increases traffic to other people's blogs, if you include links, which I always try to do. I love the camaraderie of blogging and I hate that a few mean people out there try to spoil it for us.
ReplyDeleteI say we gather up an 'anti -anonymous-bitchy-commentators' gang and have a whale of a time leaving comments against the cowards on all our blogs ...Hmm - or would that just take up too much time? Specially as I bet they're too stupid and small minded to even come back and read them. Well - hold our heads high as my mother always said ;..Sticks and stones and all the rest. Lurvely post!
ReplyDeleteHey Louise, Oh, geez, mean comments...life is so very short, there must be something better for these meanies to do.
ReplyDeleteI'm all about sharing the love!!! Muwah!!!
xoxo Beth
Oh Sweetie- this needs to be said once or twice a year I think! I had forgotten about a couple of nasties. Two issues I have found, people IRL bringing up persoanl things they read on my blog and usuing it against me (sad as that means they are "friends and family" , and I have seen another dear friend get bitten in the ass a time or two by nasty peeps. They suck. They are usually petty people with nothing better to do . I choose to spend my time visiting with the kinder set in life and in blogland. I am certain I have grabbed a photo a time or two and misrepresented the author or comepletely forgotten to attribute. . My intent is always to be kind and never to hurt. Same for 90% of us I do believe.
ReplyDeleteLove to you Sunshine.
Laurel
wow! great post as per usual!
ReplyDeleteLOVE your blog sooooo much!
Such an inspiration! Definitely
bookmarking you righttt now!
Hope you can stop by mine
sometime :) xx
The lovely thing about reading blogs is that you get a chance to learn about other people's lives and ideas. I find it so bizarre that anyone would spend their time writing nasty comments to people. One poor woman was ripped to shreds by someone because her house looked too clean in photographs! As William Shatner once said on Saturday Night Live~"People get a life!"
ReplyDeletei am 100 percent with you on this. that image sums it up perfectly. thank you for posting this, louise--so, so well said, really. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteAmen to that sista!! If you can't say something nice...really why bother to comment. BUT ~ if you do choose to "flame" someone in comments at least have the "balls" to put your name to it. Love this post ~ happy Friday!!
ReplyDeleteAs one of lifes' 'people pleasers', I find it really difficult to comprehend how people can be so mean? Why read a blog you don't like, and if there is something on a regularly visited blog you don't agree with....keep schtum! Why, why, why take pleasure in upsetting someone? MEAN MEAN MEANIES. Just discovered your blog and think it's lovely by the way! x
ReplyDeleteArgh.. just lost my comment! Anyhoo the thread of it was that I just don't get why anonymous trolls feel the need to do this? I haven't had one yet but I know it'll come and when it does, theres the dilemma of do you publish and show them up for what they are or do you delete their voice? You're like me - you don't do bad people. xxx
ReplyDeleteDid they leave the comments up? I moderate comments and won't post any meaningless bullshit, but even if you don't moderate, you can delete. I think that's what drives the trolls crazy. Don't even give them the space. Don't explain and don't apologize.
ReplyDelete