A little bit of honest me...

posted on: Tuesday, 20 December 2011

I had a nice, festive blog post in mind, but instead what you'll get is a selection of extracts from my mind, as of now...but rest assured there will be some Christmas 'things of beauty' before the week is done.

This always happens. I get more excited about Christmas in late November than I do when the real thing is almost upon us. Somehow this year there is a sense of unreality which I can only attribute to the current calmness of my life. I am not in a rush. I have time. I do not have to balance working and homemaking. I have lists where I can actually tick off actions, one by one, in a normal, sane manner. This is indeed new territory for me. I like it.

via dust jacket attic from style me pretty
Meanwhile someone closest to me, namely my lovely husband, is working like there is no tomorrow. The contrast between us incongruous. I sense this may be one of the perils of being a housewife (my albeit temporary status). He is a whirlwind and I am a constant. I am the eye of his storm; the oddly quiet, alternative world of our home, as the rest of his corporate world swirls around. Suffice to say, it's a tough time to be corporate.

I finally watched the film 'Black Swan'. It's a great film, I can entirely see why Natalie Portman won the Oscar. But what has stayed with me as well, a little like an unwelcome guest, is a fascination with how her body looked. How thin she was. How all ballerinas have that grace, that look, which is almost prepubescent. I found myself wondering what it would be like to be that thin again, as I once was, aged about 15. Now of course I am a healthy, fit weight and after my children I have curves in places there never used to be curves. Thanks to a lot of training in recent months, I am now fitter than I have ever been; but conversely I weigh more. Gone though, is that waif-like quality of youth. A dancer's body...is it wrong to silently covet such an unobtainable thing?

And so this week continues, children counting down, while I try to keep a grasp on the real meaning of the season. My answer to everything: walking in the great outdoors. Now, with the addition of the puppy, walking is an everyday pursuit that I inflict on my family.

At the weekend, I woke early and my son and I did rounds of the fields behind our house before the sun had come up. It was an icy morning, crisp and fresh and oh-so-bracing. At times like those, I am so grateful for my impetuous decision to get a dog. Without him, we would not be charging round fields before sunrise on any given Saturday morning. Maybe when I made the choice to get him, I knew somewhere deep inside that we needed him. We needed something him our little family.

On Sunday, we went to a beautiful, stylish drinks party in a beautiful, stylish house. A wintery afternoon of canapé perfection and champagne flutes. It was lovely. The fact remains that loveliness for me does equate to beautiful things; elegant places and little details. I notice all the details in a heartbeat. And so it goes for me; one day in wellies, the next in heels. I like the contrasts... :-)

more via dust jacket attic


  1. I think the approach and run-up to Christmas is almost the best part (particularly when one is organised!)....lots of people seem to say that. I guess it's the anticipation, the events and the planning....lots of fun :)

    I really liked "Black Swan" even though it scared the life out of me!! But there we differ, I've never been waif-like AND would never want a dancer's body!! I love what they can do but to me it's curves that make a woman.

    Hope you're happy Lou....be happy :) XX

  2. I loved reading this post and thinking about things with you. I must say the morning walks sound rather chilly and the stylish drinks party sounds so very lovely.

    thank you so much for the links
    hugs DJ

  3. Hi Lou,
    It's funny how we all differ.....I was SO disappointed with Black Swan. After all of the hype, to me it was stereotypical on all levels....the pushy mother, the bitchy dancers, the infactuation of the choreographer and the lesbian touches ( if you'll pardon the expression !! hehe )
    BUT.....I LOVE Christmas !! The lead up, buying presents, wrapping the presents, opening the presents ! I take about half an hour to open each present....I savour every moment. Our children tell me off every year. It's a standing joke now. Of course, we all still believe in Father Christmas .....well, why wouldn't we ?
    When I was at work, many of our patients were members of the Royal Ballet and, to see their bodies in the flesh and up close, you wouldn't want to look like that..... not for all the tu tu's in Swan Lake. No bust, skin and bone and muscular calves. Not a thing of beauty, although beautiful when dancing and on stage.
    Enjoy all of those beautiful little Christmas details and the togetherness of family. XXXX

  4. I know just what you mean about enjoying the Christmas buildup...anticipation is almost sweeter than the real thing. But then isn't Christmas really the entire season and not just a single day? At least to me it is.

    I have to agree with Simone on the dancer's body....I've never had one either and wouldn't care for it at all. I'd much prefer a strong, healthy body - long and lean to be sure, but with curves in all the right places.

    Glad you're able to really enjoy the season this year - I'm sorry your husband isn't, but then he has you to help get everything ready, and hopefully he'll be able to get a break as well. My husband is the same.

    Happy Christmas!

  5. I have never been a waif ~ I think I am still holding onto my baby fat and I never had kids!! Black Swan is on my list of movies to watch ~ hopefully in the new year. A crisp morning walk is a special treat especially with one of your Boos and the puppy. Nice to see that you are the calm in hubby's storm. xo

  6. I know exactly what you mean; wellies and heels is how I live my life too. I wouldn't have it any other way! Enjoy you calm, well planned festive season. B x

  7. I know what you mean about your dog. I'm also very happy about my decision to get a dog because now I'm obliged to walk every day, and to wake up early. I love it!

  8. It's quite easy to tell you like beautiful things..your photos show an immense attention to detail and they are always gorgeous! You have amazing tastes:) x LZ

  9. I suffered greatly with atypical facial pain. I began my healing journey with "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay. Get to the root of what you can't "face" and your healing will begin... with much love, a new reader from New Jersey, USA....

  10. Oh poo-poo on Black Swan. You are a beautiful,kind, caring, intelligent woman who I have come to adore. That was a MOVIE. I love every single thing about the Christmas season, the white twinkling lights, gifts, cocktail parties, new clothes, decorating the house & tree. Everything!
    Let's enjoy the last few days of fantasy & fun with our families before the New Year sets in upon us. Merry Merry Christmas, darling...

  11. Dear Lou

    I wish you a Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year. May your pain go away and let you be very happy. Warm Christmas hugs, Manuela

  12. Love the second pic - really beautiful.


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